Grief Makes You Crazy

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The Unique Loneliness of Grief

Most people don’t think in depth about the idea of loneliness. Loneliness is one of those concepts we assume we know. We equate it to the very definable concept of being alone, which means “without other people”, and thanks to “lonely people” archetypes — like the spinster with 10 cats and the misunderstood teenager — we …

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Seeking Order In The Aftermath Of Loss

Eleanor wrote a pretty great post on shattered assumptions about the world after a death, and she described the following as a common reaction: “The sense that their death was meaningless may ultimately lead to the question of “Why?!?” “Why did they have to die? Why did this happen to me? Who is at fault? …

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More Than Just a Teapot: The items that connect past and present

The acorn necklace my sister, Jessie, gave me the Christmas after my mom died is in this twisted, tangled mess of silver chains and baubles.  It’s the same kind of necklace my mother wore when she was sick. At that time she told us that the acorn stood for strength, but acorns had been special …

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The Moments that Matter: Looking at life in hindsight

I didn’t have a meaningful moment with my mother before she died. Well, that’s not true, my life with her was filled with meaningful moments. I guess what I mean is that I never had the Hollywood Moment that, in the movies, is part and parcel of death by terminal illness. My mother never sat in her bed, …

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Death, Grief, and Shattered Assumptions

“Some people’s lives seem to flow in a narrative; mine had many stops and starts. That’s what trauma does. It interrupts the plot. You can’t process it because it doesn’t fit with what came before or what comes afterwards.” ― Jessica Stern You never think the worst will happen to you, and then one day it does. …

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Questions of Life, Mortality and Grief

Existential angst and death anxiety run in my blood.  I think I get it from my Dad’s side of the family, although it’s hard to be sure.  Several of my immediate relatives have it and I’m pretty sure my 9 year old daughter does as well because she asks me about it all the time. For example, …


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